is that i could look into those eyes and tell you i love you.
to be wrapped up into your amrs so tight everynight.
to know that those words are true because i hear them directly.
to just be with you.

that is my wish.

im single for starters. woot? i dont know. ive got my eye really "trained" on a certain guy and i hope he can read the signs. hopefully his parents will let us hang out this friday. i havent seen the boy in forever!!

theres a situatuion about trust right now involving me and some others. why i dont know. weve been friends since second semester of freshman year. sure it was just this year that we really got close but still weve been friends for a while and youd think theyd take your side and not someones that theyve met once or twice...or not even at all. its just ridiculous. but whatever. im done with it. the friendship is at a point where im seriously debating whether or not to continue it. i dont know....like i said weve been friends for a while.

off to dance in a bit so im gunna get some food. ill try and keep all of you updated as much as possible.

as you can obviously tell most of my subject titles will be song titles :]

anyways:

ive had a rough weekend that started last thursday. im not going to go into too much detail because, well, its in the past and that drama is over.

im anxious for tomorrow. my mom is making me wear yellow. hold on but when you see yellow do you think funeral or do you think happy? i think happy. wierd but whatever. ill go through my closet tonite and see what i have. if i have anything else, im wearing that instead of the yellow top. oh its also black pants and black flats.

today was blah but its almost over so i guess its alright. "thank you its been another bloody monday." tokio hotel knows just what to say. haha

oh! good news. i got back with steve sooner than expected. why? because i realized that i love him more than i ever thought. while going out with him i didnt think i deserved him and now i dont care. all i want to be is with him. hes taking me to prom. the way he asked was so cute, or at least i thought it was. he sent me a letter and inside was a slip of paper that was colored in this cool design and on the back it said "you are formally invited to prep's prom. ie will you go to prom with me?" it made me smile so very big. i felt a little guilty at getting upset with him...but only a little. haha.

i kinda want to miss all of school tomorrow but i know i cant. one because i have to go to school to get a ride after second period and then i cant leave the church because my ride is going back to school as well. bleck. second even if i do go back to school no one will be home to come and get me from school because my grandpa is working then.

thats all for now.

~a girl who knows what she wants.

i love that song. :]

news update: im single. yea i broke up with him. i miss him terribly. this summer though im going back out with him. ive promised both him and myself that. i want to know what its like to have a real relationship with him. i still love him and i always will. he means so much to me. i couldnt bear to live life without him.
*whispers* hello i miss you quite terribly.



Here I go
Scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only
My only one

Made my mistakes
Let you down
And I can't
I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't
I can't get up when you're gone



a clip from Only One ~ Yellowcard

i wanna jump up and down and yell that! but i have a sprained ankle. go me!! no it wasnt my fault. why does everyone assume it was my fault?! heres what happend: i was underneath lots of people in a dog pile. and steve[bf] sat on my ankle while tickling josh. josh spazes out when he is tickled and so i tried to get away. i failed and steve sat on my ankle harder as i was moving it in a semi-wierd direction. so now its swollen and hurts. i also have a semi black eye. again thanks to someone tickling josh and him slamming his head into the side of my eye. it looks kinda cool. also its painful when i touch it. so yea! it wasnt my fault! and the black eye is slowly going away. well i can finally get this ace wrap off completely on april 16. maybe sooner if im good. hopefully before spring break ends. but i doubt it. dammit! life hates me. it truely does. oh well.

til next time,
a girl whos wanted